On the verge of solitude

Everyday when I wake up, I realize that I am alone. Err... I have a roommate who shares the queen-size in our room and what I meant alone is something emotionally, mentally and sexually.

It feels miserable. I refuse to wake up but lie down tetraplegically forcing myself to go on dreaming. I love my dreams. I don't usually remember all my dreams but I strongly believe they are (and should be!) more pleasant than my pathetic real life. They say it's unhealthy to do that but well, I am a dreamer and I enjoy it, a lot.

I've been thinking of getting a new partner. Seriously, I do. 2 more weeks and it'll be my 1st anniversary of being single, after getting myself involved in this you-know-what thingee. Nevertheless, I can't decide. I hate decision makings. I never do. I will never do.

I have been reflecting bout my ex-partners. Anyway, it's time I let go and forgive them (or pretend that they forgave me).

What am I looking for now. I don't know, honestly, but seriously I'll know when the time has come. I admit I ain't perfect. Nobody is so I won't ask for perfection. I only ask for compatibility (and it's pseudo-perfection anyway).

About me:

Almost 24, overweight and miserable. Losing my hair & my self esteem, and my sanity soon. Emotional & chaotic. Simple and ordinary, but apted to give people the false idea that I am a prodigee. Shy and unsecure. Jack of all trades and masters of none. Enjoys but despises being the center of the attention. Gets fed up easily. Picky and fastidious about life , but never about food. Enjoys sentimental music with a little tinge of rock and pop. Obsessed with British films and their accent. Hates sports but loves and misses tag. Enjoys playing with colours and people's ego. Knows nothing about but fascinated with art, history and architecture. Worships nature and beauty.

What I look for in someone:

Around my age. Simplicity. Dresses moderately and mind you, no disasterous hairstyles. Easy going and understanding. Small body figure (easy to hug). Great heart. Great mind. Great soul. Enjoys music and serenity. Sings instead of complains. Homely and easily satisfied. Down to earth and knows how to handle a turbulent me. Smiles and never frowns. Does not curses. Draws and designs. Enjoys literature and movies. Pulls an angelic face when I get mad at him. Enjoys intimacy.